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Thursday 27 March 2014

Never buy a car you can’t push



“Never buy a car you can’t push”-Anonymous

Those are great words.  Possibly by someone whom had as frequent vehicle trouble as I have.  Also, I stole it from the petrol station up the road.

I was very fortunate to have grown up in an environment where I would spend most school holidays and at least one weekend per month on a farm.  I was 10 years old when my grandfather passed away and my late granny sold the farm, my uncle Zirk took up a jobs as farm manager on two farms a few km down the road.  What started off on my late granddad’s farm, continued on the farms where my uncle used to work.  All three farms were real bushveld farms, in the Mabula area.  Here you would find cattle, donkeys, a lost horse every now-and-then, peanut-, sunflower- and maize fields, and during winter game was hunted.  You do not need a license to drive on a farm.  You just need someone with patience to teach you how to drive a donkey, a 210 liter oil drum and a donkey car.  Some things you can’t steer and you simply become a passenger in an old tractor tyre steered by rocks and roots of trees.  Does not matter where you start, you never end up where you wanted to.  Coming to a halt is the most frightening part of the journey.  When that tyre goes down on its side you have to make sure you have no body parts protruding else you could end up with a severely bruised or even broken limb.  It was always a good idea to lift your head away from the ground to lighten the severity of concussion.  Swinging on gates was also a favorite pastime.

Then I got older and I turned to things with engines.  First it was my aunt Hannetjie teaching me the basics in Uncle Stanleys almost brand new automatic Audi as an eight-year old.  To this day I’m not sure if he knows about that, and I have no intention of ever telling him!  (Cousins, you keep your mouths shut).  I could hardly see over the dashboard.  From there on things happened at pace.  Tractors, bakkies, cars, motorbikes, BIGGER tractors, eight-ton trucks, massive maize harvesters, almost anything you can find on a farm that had a engine.  If you can say that starting the engine of a pivot irrigation system means “driving” it, I also drove a Rolls Royce!  Those Rolls Royce engines were HUGE!

That was the end of my care-free, car-free life.

My first legally on the road vehicle was a 1983 Yamaha RZ 50 motorcycle.  I borrowed money from my granny, R700 to pay for that bike.  I must add that I paid her all back when I started work.  I used this during my last two school years to get to school and back.  It died a slow death after I stopped using it and eventually was tripped for spares and the rest was scrapped.  Fortunately I never had any major problems with her but ran out of petrol at least once between Valhalla and Rooihuiskraal.  In the early 80’s there simply was NOTHING on that stretch of road except for the odd farmhouse here and there.  I did beg for petrol at one house which was used as a base for a business but was given a cold shoulder by a lady after she chatted to the boss-man.  I caught a glimpse of the boss-man and as I left I thought I recognized him but did not bother to turn back.  Up to this day I believe it was a family member but honestly don’t feel like embarrassing neither of us.  I simply cannot recall how I got home but it was not too big an issue I guess.

Then my dad bought me a 1982 Peugeot 504 1800cc.  Only R1900 at an auction.  She needed a new battery and part of the exhaust system replaced and she was on the road.  I started using her towards the end of my matric year.  I was using my “Rooi Gevaar” for frequent weekend trips between Centurion and Air Force Base Hoedspruit when an Impala simply jumped in front of me one Sunday evening just outside Burgersfort.  The front of the car was wrecked, the two National Servicemen I gave a lift had to get back to Hoedspruit on their own steam that evening, and I could not push the car back to town.  Early next morning I walked back to town, reported the accident, organized for the car to be towed to a panelbeater and then started hitchhiking to Hoedspruit.  A few lifts and many hours later I arrived in Hoedspruit.  My dad later replaced her and she was passed on to someone in need of a car.

The Peugeot was replaced with a 1977 Mercedes Benz 200.4.  Lovely family car, just needed a family!  Once Irma and I got married we still used her for a while but later realized we did not need two cars so I returned her to my dad.  He sadly sold her.  Now this was a HUGE car, and I walked MANY kilometers because of her.  I was working for De Beers at that time, working at a field exploration camp just outside Delareyville.  During a long-weekend I organized for it to be serviced in Welkom while visiting my parents in Hennnenman.  On my way back to Delareyville, at about nine in the evening and somewhere between Wolmaransstad and a little place called Migdol the engine died on me.  I walked the remaining 29.5 km to the camp – I measured the distance the next morning with the bakkie on my way back to the car to tow her in.  The sad part is that only ONE car passed me during my route march that night and the driver did not even bother to slow down.  It later turned out the guys servicing the car did not fit the oil filter properly, I ran the engine dry.

Later, as the family expanded, and Irma and I worked in different directions, we added a 1989 BMW 320i to our vehicle history, filling up the empty space underneath the carport.  Loved the little car but we got to a stage where we would fill up with oil and check the petrol.  She also had a major problem with a temperamental alternator but I was never stranded with her, not even after Irma had a little accident between Kenhardt and Calvinia.

Irma owned a 1992 VW City Golf 1300 she bought shortly before we got married in 1994.  A few hiccups, fortunately all happened at someone’s house where lifts were available except for one instance where she died on Irma one morning on her way to work.  The car started when I arrived at Irma and the broken down car, somewhere between work and home.  We suspect the immobilizer was having a bad day.  Another problem was two flat tyres Irma picked up on the N12 one morning on her way to Alberton.  Fortunately we had a second spare so I could take it out to her and get her going.  We never had a problem again after that until she (the car, not Irma) pulled the disappearing act on us in June 2006.

I replaced the BMW with a Mercedes Benz E220.  I love the car.  However, she has been being very temperamental over the past three years but she has never left me stranded at any place other than home.  No major pushing needed other than shunting her around the driveway and carport!

Irma replaced the stolen Golf with a brand new, green Huyndai Atos which was written off by a jerk in 2012 when he skipped a stop street.  That was the only time Martin and I had to organize a lift home.

In the meantime I bought a Gomoto Freedom 125 to get to work and back.  I bought a cheapy with the idea if I did like the idea of biking again I did not waste too much money.  Good thing.  After only about 17000 kilometers it started giving all kinds of trouble and I could not find a specific spare part.  She died on me one afternoon on my way home on the M1.  Fortunately I could push her home for the last three kilometers.  Martin eventually got her going again and it became his toy, teaching himself how to drive a bike.

The green Atos then was replaced with a white, 2010 Atos.  She is still going strong, never let us down once.

I replaced the Gomoto with a Honda E-Storm 125.  Except for the occasional flat tyre, all fine so far.  One good thing about her, she can be pushed, like I have done many times!

Saturday 15 March 2014

How to find a special!



I’m a bit of an impulsive shopper.  This is completely true when it comes to peanuts.  Salted or not, raisins or not, as long as I get my peanuts.  However, for most items with a price tag where you look at the tag at least twice before you even lift it of the shelve to read the fine print, I will do some research on specs and pricing before hitting the shops.

One of the easiest ways to do research on the items I desire to purchase is to page through the leaflets received with our free weekly community newspapers.  Sometimes I have a problem with my Saturday morning browsing for “specials”, or our free newspaper for that matter.  In our yard we have two free-roaming, deluxe model shredders.  Both are of the “DOG” brand, one a “FEMALE” model, the other a “MALE” model.  Now, I love technology and when we obtained these wireless shredders I was given the assurance that their levels of “intelligence” will allow them to be trained in such a way that they will only shred selected papers.  Never trust anybody giving you anything for free, especially when it is a wireless device.

For the past year I haven’t been able to “train” these two shredders to shred only papers I allow them to shred.  They simply shred any paper and anything.  Obtaining a wireless shredder is not the way to go.  I have also given up training those guys delivering the newspapers from simply tossing the paper over the wall, directly into the random path used by the shredders.

Then a friend came along and told me about a website where I can find all my weekly specials online - provided my deluxe DOG shredders haven’t received some instruction to shred my PC.  As long as I have my PC, and ESKOM likes me, I can browse all those specials online, even receiving daily notifications on Items I am in the market for.  Paperless leaflets at http://www.guzzle.co.za/

Greetings,

Besembek


Tuesday 11 March 2014

Something simply got lost in translation!



I was indirectly accused of being a bad father because Martin uses the terms “jy” and “jou” when he addresses me.  To add to the insult, a whole lot of people thought it would be a good idea to "bliksem" people like us “to sort us out”, some suggesting that the only thing that will "sort out" kids like Martin is sending them to the “army”.  I don’t know which army but I would never let my son into the current SANDF to deteriorate into a piece of ill-mannered, ill-disciplined oxygen thief.  That is said with respect to the few guys out there really giving it their best shot.  I have met some of them and you can tell they are really having hard times.  I also know some ex-members whom can testify to this.  I have seen some of the others and they are a disgrace to this nation.  But that is not what we are talking about today.

I’m OK with it if Martin “jy” and “jou” me.  Here is why:

Martin is well-behaved, well-mannered, and an absolute pleasure to have as a son.  He does not need the army, or any military-type institution to teach him anything about respect.  He has me - I grew up as a PF-child (children with parents in the permanent force are referred to as PF-children), there is nothing you can teach me about showing respect and good manners.  Martin is 17-years old, still a child, but he has it in him to do ANYTHING I ask him to do, he has the endurance to do km after km in races or on game walks, or on a hunting farm.  He handles a rifle with skill, the same as he does with a car or motor-bike.  He is the one who paints the roof of our house (that is when I can afford the paint!), washes cars, do the garden, paints the house if needed, helps me when I work on my car or bike, iron his own clothes (and mine if I could not get to it myself), and also helps out with other chores if the schedules gets tight for other members of the family.  He can even put a meal together without the help of his mother.  He will protect his family and friends with his life – that he showed when his mother was attacked on the pavement in front of our house.  Since he had his brains he has been taking on anybody who would dare make any negative remark about his disabled brother.  He is the most patient person when it comes to spending time and playing with Stiaan.  He also is grown-up enough to not be bothered by petty issues.  And he does not lack respect (or at least good manners for those who do not deserve respect) towards anybody in any way.

I grew up in an environment where I “Pa, sal Pa asseblief…”.  Where that I learn that from?  From my dad, when he addressed his father, or father-in-law.  That is where I learned to use Pa four times or more in a sentence, almost every weekend.  Also, I was fortunate enough to have a grandmother until about three years ago.  What also helped is the fact that I NEVER spoke a word, or never was subject to the English language, besides in the classroom environment, until I was in my matric year and took on a job at a Greek’s corner cafĂ©.  Only then was I forced to speak English outside the classroom for the first time in my life.  I will explain why NOT speaking English helped in a moment.

How did my son grow up?  Martin grew up in a slightly different way.  During his most important forming years he VERY seldom saw his grandparents.  One passed away before he was born, the other when he was still a baby, the next in his very early teens.  He still has a grandfather but because of distance we very seldom see my dad.  His next best example was from myself and my wife, Irma addressing me with “Riaan, sal JY asseblief…”.  Now he obviously knew I was his dad, not his Riaan, so he would address me as “Pa (even Pappie, to this very day), sal JY asseblief…”  Now, to make it even more difficult for the young chap, from when he was four months old he was enrolled in nursery schools where there were kids speaking English and Afrikaans.  Martin developed very good friendships with some of these English speaking kids, way more than what I did as a youngster (In my time apartheid was worse between English speaking kids and Afrikaans speaking kids, than between black and white.  We organised major boxing matches on Friday afternoons after school between the Boertjies and the Souties!).  By the time he went to primary school he was fluent in English, despite growing up in an Afrikaans speaking home.  In English, it is VERY common for youngsters to use “you” when addressing (with respect) their parents or any other person.  And “you” translates to “jy” and “jou”.  So, if he got a bit confused between you, jy and jou, what is the issue?  He still struggles with the concept that “’n kar breek”.  He still believes that “’n kar breek af”.  Something simply got lost in translation.

Something that also may be upsetting some people (actually, it was the same person who got upset about the jy’ing and jou’ing) about the way Martin and I (and Irma for that matter) interact is the humour we share.  In our family we have plenty issues with chronic illnesses, family members murdered, robberies, attacks, disabilities, etc.  Because of this, we much rather see the funny instead of the somber in life.  We joke about life and death and everything in between.  If not, what kind of life would we have?  “Who will open the gate if you were to die?”.  “Please keep the number for Mr Delivery close by – just in case Mom dies.”,  “I’m feeling sorry for the person who inherits my stuff – all he will get is debt”, etc, etc.  That does not mean we do not respect each other.  We do, and we love each other to bits, and respect one another.

So, to (some of) my friends:  We may leave this world at any time.  Don’t throw your toys out of your cot about petty issues like Martin jy’ing ang jou’ing Irma and I.  We are OK with it.  If you are not, sorry for you!

To KK and Junior:  In case the BUS HITS ME, the keys to the third floor cabinet is on the red key thinghy with the keys to the other cabinets.  Please tell Floydie to make sure that the network is up before we move NAB on Thursday, and please sort out the printers and loose ends at Finance and HR today.  There are issues with ordering coffee and tea at work, so when we are out of stock we are on our own.  And no, I don’t know when we will be getting our increases!

To my family, and more so to Martin:  Enjoy life while you can, joke about it from beginning to end and everything in between, call me whatever you want to, I know where I stand with you.  And I love you too.

Greetings,

Besembek

Monday 3 March 2014

The sound of music!



Santana happened over the weekend.

I have no idea what Santana is, or who if it is someone.  I just know a lot of people went there and they loved it.  Not even sure where there is.  Looks like FNB.  I thought M&M (why do people name their kids after chocolates) were doing their thing at FNB this weekend?  Or were there two shows?  Who are these dudes?  Manie & Marius?  Or are they girls?  Meisie & Marie?

Music and celavatories are not really my thing.  That department belongs to Irma and Martin.  They know the artists, the lyrics, the everything.  Yes, I have bought music before.  And I will listen to the music of some people.  People like Piet Veerman.  Dennis East.  Theuns Jordaan.  Maybe one or two others I can’t think of right now.

My favourite music of all time:  You get into Mapungubwe National Park or Kruger National Park (even Pilanesberg National Park if you get desperate), ‘phones off, radio off, windows down (or slightly down should it rain), and off you go.  Our Atos is the best for game viewing.  All you do is get her into fifth gear and take your foot off the accelerator.  That gives us 25km/hour.  Best speed to listen to the music of nature.  With some luck you sometimes see the artists also.  I do not know the names of all the artists, but I do know that their performances are way better than those of Santana, Manie, Marius, Meisie and Marie added together.

I think it is time to get into one of these places again, time to listen to one of the best music compilations ever, time to see the Zebra, not the Zebra crossing.  Life in Johannesburg actually sucks, I just realized.

Greetings,

Besembek